THE FUNKA-Moscow Mule:

ZERO-PROOF, ZERO-CHILL, ALL CHAOS

This is not a polite porch sipper.
This is a barefoot-on-the-coffee-table, mint-flying, speakers-sweating situation.        

Start off your Party or New Year’s Celebrations the Right Way!

Make a Funka-Moscow Mule at your Party to Remember!

Let’s Start Your Party!

Ingredients:

• 6 oz Ginger Beer – so spicy it argues back (NOT Ginger Ale)
• 1 oz fresh lime juice squeezed with intent
• THC drops dosed like you mean it, but still respect yourself
• A fat handful of fresh mint, torn, not muddled
• Ice. Loud ice. Crushed and ready to rip.
• Optional chaos:
  • Splash of pineapple juice for disco sweat
  • Tiny pinch of cayenne for bad decisions
  • Rim dusted with lime salt or tajín

Ritual, Not Instructions:

1. Music first. (Get your Generational head straight: Put on the music of your peers. (For me: Parliament, old Prince, Michael, Sly, Commodores), or something that makes your furniture nervous, cause it knows what’s comin’.
2. Ice the glass until it fogs like a club bathroom mirror.
3. Lime juice and THC drops in. Pause. Nod to the beat.
4. Mint goes in last, torn by hand, like it owes you money.
5. Ginger beer splashdown. Let it foam. Let it live.
6. One aggressive stir. Not a swirl. A declaration.
7. Garnish wildly. Mint crown. Lime wheel sideways. No symmetry.

Party Warnings (Ignored Immediately):

• THC beverages creep, then strut. Sip. Dance. Sip again.
• Label the pitcher unless you enjoy the chaos of the legal variety.
• Someone will say, “This doesn’t taste strong.”
  They are incorrect. Give it time.

Serving Notes:

• Best enjoyed while:
  • Dancing badly
  • Laughing too hard
  • Solving the universe and forgetting it five minutes later
• Absolutely not for folding laundry or replying to emails.

Here’s to a Very Happy Holiday Season and a Bright, Shiny New Year! 

From all of us at Best Copy Now Agency to You! 

Be brave, be healthy, and kick up your nasty, bad self!